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The Great Parenting Debates

Amy Chua's Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother

The well-written and witty memoir Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother (one way to market a parenting book in this time of war and political violence)is a mixed bag. Chua thinks parents should hold high expectations and encourage kids to work hard and achieve competence. Yes, hurray for that! But the  Read More 
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Shielding our Kids from Pain -- Should You Ever Ignore that Impulse?

Have you ever had to fight the urge to do your child’s homework or complete a project for him? At the recent Learning & the Brain Conference in Cambridge, Mass., my coauthor Wendy Grolnick talked about the natural human urge to shield our young from emotional, social, and psychological pain. When parents face certain pressures, however, that  Read More 
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What Can Parents Learn from Andre Agassi?



Andre Agassi hated tennis? That’s the surprise in his new autobiography Open, but the surprise evaporates when you read why: Agassi didn’t choose to play tennis. He felt forced to play. His immigrant dad wanted his son to live the American dream, to have the life choices he’d not had himself,  Read More 
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Empathizing is Hard to Do

Yesterday while talking to parents at Echo Horizon school in Culver City, Ca. about Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids, I mentioned that I’d found giving my kids empathy difficult --- even though I know empathy helps you take a child’s point of view, which strengthens her feelings of autonomy. I guess  Read More 
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Kudos to a Reporter!

Here's an excellent article on Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids: Grolnick to Discuss Pressure, Stress It's angled around an announcement of Wendy's next talk on our book, but the amazing feature of this article is that it seems  Read More 
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Should We Make our Kids Do Certain Activities?

After I spoke to a PTA group recently about Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids, a dad approached me. "You say to support kids' autonomy and not pressure them, but when I was a kid my parents took me to the theater twice a year -- even when I said 'Hey I wanna stay home and play  Read More 
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College Applications Still Driving Kids – and Parents – Crazy

The glossy pamphlets still flood in: “Live, study, and work in both sleek high-rise towers and turn-of-the-century brownstones,” reads the gorgeously thick Boston University brochure. “Win a Hummer. All you have to do is attend an SJSU football game” trumpets San Jose State University’s.

As kids fill out their college applications amidst the  Read More 
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The Overscheduling Myth

Why do we love to criticize other parents for overscheduling their kids?

Maybe it’s a way to justify the choices that you’ve made. “You’ve decided this isn’t your lifestyle,” says sociologist Sandra Hofferth, “and rejected those of other people.”

There’s probably more criticism of overscheduling in America today than  Read More 
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When your child wants to quit an activity

“My son quits every activity I take him to!” complained a mother the other night at a PTA meeting where I spoke about Pressured Parents. “What should I do?”
That’s a good question, because at one time or another all of us parents face this dilemma. What do you tell your child who  Read More 
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How to Relieve College Application Pressure

Baylor University's student newspaper, The Lariat, recently revealed that the school has paid already-admitted freshmen to retake the SAT. The program raised average test scores for incoming freshmen, and therefore could help the school’s US News & World Report ranking. Faculty, who hadn't known about this latest example of the misuse of testing in  Read More 
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